Recently I abused my body in a workshop and ended up with a very sore, tight left shoulder/neck. I was very uncomfortable, but then began to experience some numbness and tingling in my fingerpads and extreme sensitivity in my wrist and elbow. This made me very nervous. Having been a personal injury paralegal for a number of years, I knew that numbness and tingling and sensitive nerves was not a good thing.

In the meantime I tried to continue my practice. In the first days I felt confident that it was just my normal shoulder crud with additional soreness from overuse. I got a couple of massages, which helped, but it got to the point where I couldn’t raise my arm beyond 45 degrees without serious pain and cracking. So I thought I might actually rest it for a bit, and alternate ice and heat (and Toast), along with some prescription ibuprofen. That seemed to help some. But I couldn’t help but notice that the Toast was losing it’s heat or that the pain and discomfort was getting worse and less predictable.

At this point at a previously scheduled doctor’s appointment, I mentioned it to my doctor. He immediately scheduled me for a nerve conduction study and EMG both of which were normal, thank goodness. I’ve been told to take it easy and have a follow up in six weeks. Muscle relaxers have worked wonders.

Once I accepted that my shoulder was not going to loosen up after a few days, I began to focus on the gentler side of my practice. When I attended class I only took the simplest form of each asana, but really worked on my form and breath. I couldn’t do much with the shoulder, it was really locked up, so just did what I could and really didn’t push to my edge, but I did try to work as hard as I could within my restrictions.

Now that my shoulder seems to be substantially better, I know that I have to accept my limitations. I can’t just try to power through. I have to take a step back and work on some basics before I can move forward again. But for every step back, I like to think I will take several steps forward.

If you will allow it, the effect of yoga on your mood can be profound. I’ve seen it, and I’ve experienced it, but since everything begins with the individual, the individual must allow it to happen.

Look, you can come to a yoga class with an open heart and mind and be open to whatever experience may come your way. Or you can be dragged unwillingly to a yoga class, with a closed mind or preconceived notions, and get absolutely nothing out of it.

So a definite prerequisite to the effects of yoga on you would be taking your yoga when you are ready. When you can leave any judgment at the door, you can open yourself to the experience.

We’ve all gone into class before in a bad mood. Whether it’s been a rough day, you don’t feel great, something is weighing on your mind, or you just feel sad, there are plenty of times and reasons that you enter class not in the best frame of mind. In that position, if you can be open to the class, listen to your teacher’s words without thinking too much, without being overanalytical or trying to think ahead. Be present in that time, that space, that moment. Try to use your breath to focus so that you can let the monkey mind quiet. Just let yourself go.

When you finish the class, examine your mood. You will invariably find that it’s lighter, that your chest feels less tight, your mind clearer and your focus more clear. You may even be able to solve a problem or two without the constant chatter of an unquiet mind.

I have experienced this progression as a student. I am privileged to see this progression in other students when I teach. When someone comes to class distracted, anxious or otherwise out of sorts, I can see clearly as the class goes on how the yoga effects the student. I can see breathing become more even … relaxation and grace creep into their muscles … faces smooth out … it is truly a privilege to witness, and more or less instant gratification for both me and the student.

This is when I know my offering of yoga is complete, when someone’s mood and point of view have changed so dramatically.

Imagine how nice it would be to start off your day that way. I’m a morning class person, so come visit me Sundays at 9:30 a.m. and Tuesdays at 6:30 a.m.

The light in me bows to the light in you. Namaste.

Body image and eating disorders are topics that are close to my heart.  My sister is a specialist in eating disorders.  As my daughter was growing up, there were far too many of her friends that had either obvious symptoms of an eating disorder or a clear eating disorder.  It’s scary.

As an American woman, I’ve been bombarded with images of what my body should look like my entire life.  While those images have changed slightly over the years, they are usually an unattainable figure of thinness, often assisted by editing and PhotoShop, that have warped our ideas of what a woman should look like.

Lots and lots of female yoga teachers are tiny.  When you see pictures of female master teachers, often the first thing you think is – look at those abs, those arms.  How long do I have to practice to look like that?  Often we overlook what is being done and focus on the body.

Practicing and teaching yoga has changed that perspective.  Do I still look at my teacher’s arms and think “someday”?  Sure I do.  But first I look at see what her arms are doing.  If she’s doing handstands, I look to see what she’s doing that I’m not.  If she’s in a one-armed balance posture, I pull into my core and try really hard to get there.  Yoga has taught me to look beyond the body and look at what the body can do.  My body has grown so much stronger and more flexible over the years that it is hard not to want to translate that into how my body looks.  I work very hard to mentally take that focus off the way a woman looks, but to consider whether that woman looks healthy and strong.

Yoga can change your perspective for the better, and one of the ways it does is by giving you confidence in your body.  When you have confidence, you feel far less pressure to conform to what the media would like us to believe is the optimum body type.  Allow yourself that privilege.

Today, Thanksgiving, I have given thanks for everything from my wonderful family and friends to the yummy pumpkin pie with homemade whipped cream. Like many of us, I have more to be thankful for than not.

I am thankful for my yoga practice, which brings such joy and peace to my life. I am thankful for my teacher and mentor, Angel, who continuously challenges and encourages my practice. I am thankful that I found yoga and that it has turned into such a significant part of my life.

Yoga has touched every aspect of my life, from my point of view (much more optimistic than I used to be) to my physicality and focus.

Today of all days remember every little thing you have in your life to be thankful for, and hold those things close to your heart until next Thanksgiving. Namaste

That was simply one of the most amazing experiences of my life. It was surreal and a little disconcerting to re-enter life. Especially when my first real re-entry point was LAX.

While I was at the festival, even with the ridiculously oppressive heat and dust, I had a remarkable sense of community and peacefulness. The kirtan was soothing and uplifting all at once. The classes were somewhat disorganized and the only part of the festive I felt I ddin’t get to experience as fully as I would have liked. Bhakti Fest is expanding to 4 days next year; try to get there to experience everything.

Kirtan, Kirtan, Kirtan. I had all good intentions of attending at least one class today, but the music grabbed me and held me captive. Or should I say, released my soul.

Saul David Raye was unexpectedly great and had my body up and moving, especially with his version of “People Get Ready”. When that was performed, the people in the crowd were joined together. I had really wanted to take his class, but the kirtan ran so late that Jaya Lakshmi, who was one of my main reasons for attending, went on at the same time as Saul’s class. So I stayed for the music and was transfixed. Lakshmi literally has the voice of an angel. I found myself moving into asanas just following her music. Then I realized at one point I had entered a spontaneous meditation. So transforming. Wade Morissette played a shorter set than expected, but all my favorites. Sunday I am definitely taking class. Really.

I can’t say enough about the kirtan. It was moving, relaxing, invigorating, heart filling …. so many things all at once.

And … I got my first henna tattoo! So did Angel & Kristi.

Yesterday was amazing. Hot. Dusty. Dry. Music and dancing. I spent most of my day wandering around, looking at the vendors, listening to kirtan, talking to people. I had a massage with Arianna Gouveia which was amazing. Because it was the first day, The Healing Sanctuary was not packed so I chose to visit there. I wanted to try something that I’ve never seen in South Florida – Chi Nei Tsang (chee nay song) is the ancient Taoist healing art of applying chi energy to the internal organs for detoxification, emotional release and health enhancement. This Classic Chinese abdominal massage accesses the deepest layers of the core belly as the practitioner gently manipulates the liver, spleen, large intestine and other organs with precise and intuitive movements. In terms I understand, it was a belly/core massage and it was amazing. During the massage I could feel the energy moving around, shooting out my fingers; feelings of intense lightness alternating with feelings of being grounded. My mind definitely was in another place. There were times when I felt like I was floating a few inches off the table. I had planned to take Shiva Rea’s class after, but was far too blissed out, so I spent the rest of the afternoon looking at some of the amazing art and ware that the vendors had. Some of the artwork and statues were just crazy beautiful – I got so many names of artists to look at websites when I get home! Today is day 2 and it’s my big music day – Jaya Lakshmi, Wade Morrisette, Wah! – and in between all that I definitely am going to try to get in a class today. Namaste.

I am in Yucca Valley, California, for the first ever Bhakti Fest, which is going to be held on the outskirts of Joshua Tree National Park. It begins today at noon, and I will try to have some thoughts and pictures up soon. For anyone who has never been to the desert – oh my. And the teachers and artists and vendors that are here are amazing. I’m hoping to take class with Saul David Raye today, Rainbeu Mars tomorrow, and Shiva Rea on Sunday. The kirtan participants include Joey Lugassey, Wade Imre Morrissette, Wah!, Jai Uttail, and my personal must see, Jaya Lakshmi. So far this is an amazing experience: the warmth of the people, the feeling of community and going with the flow, it feels like home in my heart.

Headstand … for about 18 months, headstand was the bane of my yogic existence. I had weak arm and neck muscles, minimal core strength, and alot of fear about falling over. Headstand came into my life because I practiced Sivananda yoga at Yoga and Inner Peace in Lake Worth for several years. Headstand is a key asana in Sivananda, being the King of Asanas. The goal was to hold it for 3 minutes. Ha!

First of all, you have to raise your legs in the air using your core and arm muscles (particularly):

This is not always easy or fun. You really have to be focused and have your core engaged to begin lifting. I love to see someone with a good core lift their legs straight in the air! It’s amazing to see. Then you have to find the point of balance – again using the core, shoulders and arms to stabilize:

Once you’ve found center and are firm in your headstand, you have to start thinking about details. Pulling shoulders up and away from ears. Breeeeaaathing. Deeply. We have a tendency to hold our breath when we are doing something difficult. Headstand is the one position I am most likely to forget to breathe in.

For many months, I actually had the headstand physically achieved, but lacked the confidence to come up on my own. I had this vision in my head that I would fall and hit the person across from me and start a domino effect of yogis falling out of headstand …. this asana gave me alot of anxiety.

Now, after 6 or 7 years, I can hold headstand for 3 minutes. Not all the time, but some days, especially when I can really climb into my head. And I can do very simple variations:

This is not in any way meant to be a instructional guide on how to do headstand. This is just an abbreviated tour of the months of sweat, anxiety, strength building, fear releasing, and eventually, guiding me into actually enjoying headstand. We do not practice headstand at Bindu for safety reasons, and I only practice it at home. I find it’s great if I need to try to focus and physically, I find it helps relieve anxiety (ironically), PMS, and mentally, it builds enormous confidence. I’ve seen students so strong and flexible they could get into variations in headstand I couldn’t even do on the ground. Many times I witnessed Neal at YIP hold headstand for 10 or 20 minutes, without breaking a sweat. Neal was, I believe, in his 70’s at the time.

What I really learned from headstand is to give everything a try, and keep on trying. Unless it causes you actual physical pain, don’t give up. Moment by moment everything can change until you find yourself looking forward to what you used to dread.

Namaste

As I’ve mentioned, I’ve suffered a number of stress related illnesses over the years.  Still do, to some extent.  I don’t think there’s any dispute that yoga helps relieve stress.  One of the physical issues that yoga has helped me with, that I didn’t even realize would happen, is a marked improvement in my posture and shoulders.

I don’t come from a family with good posture.  I realized I had bad posture but didn’t really know what to do about it.  I didn’t realize that my back and shoulder muscles were weak, that my core was weak, or that I could fix it.  For a long time I was very concerned about getting rounded or hunched as I aged.

As I followed my path through teacher training, I became aware that my shoulders were not as tired as they used to be.  Angel has worked with me consistently to both strengthen and loosen my shoulders.  Oh, how I struggled.  My shoulders felt encased in concrete.  I couldn’t, just couldn’t, bring the tips of my shoulder blades together.  I took a workshop in restorative poses for the shoulders and spent quite a bit of time with Gary Kraftsow’s book, Yoga for Wellness.  Although I’ve heard it a million times, one day fairly recently I heard my teacher say in class “broaden your collarbone”.  For all the times that I’ve been told to slide my shoulder blades down my back, bring the tips of my shoulderblades together, nothing made as much sense as “broaden your collarbone”.

When you broaden your collarbone, you open the heart center and the chest.  Your shoulders roll back and down and the shoulderblades slide down the back.  All you have to do is lengthen the tailbone down and voila! your posture is improved!

The core:  let’s face it, we’re soft in the middle.  And that’s what should hold us up.  There’s really nothing to be said about this except, get down on the floor and do a little core work.  We all need it.

This is not second nature to me at all.  Every day I have to think of broadening my collarbones, breathing deeply.  And sometimes it’s unavoidable to use bad posture, especially at my desk.  My shoulders still ache but it is a much better ache.  Importantly, my neck is also looser and as a result, I don’t get that knot on the back of my head that can cause a migraine or tension headache nearly as often.

When you start working on one thing, it all falls into place.